I Am Jealous

I am Jealous

Envy creeps into my heart as I see thousands of placards with zillion chants of Justice
I swallow my spits and all I could taste are the lies of these hypocrites.
Yes, hypocrites
Or maybe I’m just hatin
I never got the attention they are giving.

Among the thousands of placards, my brother’s was the shiniest.
He wrote “ISTAND against rape”
I hear the echoes of Justice
Of which brother was the loudest
Shouting Woe to all rapists
But I never felt the breath of his voice when I was depressed
Oh! He was always texting his lovers
His way of advocating for women’s dignity

Twitter is blazing with the hashtag #Justice
Guess what?
My sister who studied Yoruba is the senior advocate against rape.
The great influencer with her superfluous quotes
The videos she made are the ones being shared to promote justice
Yet she left my scripts unheard talkless of being auditioned

And there’s my Dad
Not protesting, not tweeting.
As usual, giving us lives updates from News as if he’s Richard Quest.
I hear him countless times cursing under his breath
For the 999th time, he said”God will never forgive the culprit behind this evil deeds”
As usual, he sits, eats, and travels.
He has done woman so much good

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To the pillar of the family,
One who carries the brunt of the family,
I appreciate your undying attention.
The only time she’s not busy is when she’s nagging
Guess that’s so much hard work too
“Can we talk about this later, I am doing something ” are the only narratives I heard.
I even formed a song with it maybe if I’d gone to the studio I could have been Adele because the skies fell too fast.
I was waiting for her to tell the updates and gist “Can we talk about this later…..
But she sacrificed 15mins and burnt rice and beans for TV updates.
I wasn’t going to use 5mins.

I’m envious of the love I was not shown by these hypocrites.
I am envious of the placard that was never raised in my name
Jealous of my unheard and unwatched scripts.
I couldn’t even gather 15 tweets
I never made it to the news, so that Dad can at least see me
I’m jealous that I was never worthy of momma’s 15mins

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I’m envious I’m the only one who knows the story of our my teacher raped me.
How he had a smile as I writhe in sorrow.
The only publicity I got was my tears and sobs,
They made me a rape vixen, for I was always merry around them (Tears& sobs)

#RiseAboveRape
#MentalInjustice

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