Welcome to IOI seek advice! We live in a world where you can be surrounded by people, but still feel lonely, with nobody to turn to when things get rough. But being heard is an important part of being human. IOI saw that there was great power in listening, but we knew not everyone had someone to talk to. We started to wonder. “How can we make being heard a reality for everyone?” That’s why IOI Seek Advice was born. No matter who you are or what you’re going through, this is a safe place where you’ll be heard and cared for. We might be strangers on the surface, but underneath we’re just the friends you haven’t met yet.
On today’s episode of Seek Advice, we present to you a young woman who is in 200 level, at Obafemi Awolowo University and found out she’s pregnant. Her parents want her to take a break, but she wants to continue her education while being a mom. She needs our help to make her decision. Time is running out, and she has to decide soon. Kindly read her story and drop some advice; she will be reading!
I have a real life issue that I need to publish because the person’s life and education depends on it.
A girl in her 20’s, just about to resume for 200 level got pregnant during the break. She hid the pregnancy for a long time until it was no longer hideable. The parent took note of the changes in her body few weeks to resumption and then demanded for scan to be done. She did the scan and it was positive.
The whole issue went on and on and she has never for once being happy about the whole situation. This alone has been affecting the pregnancy.
The parent insist she takes leave of absence but she declined the offer saying “pregnancy should not stop me from going to school, this is my life and decision. This was why I kept it away from you all for the few months I’ve been at home. Why now that we are about to resume??” All this were said on deaf ears. No one listened to her. The HOD was consulted on the case and advice was given “if she can cope with the studies and at the same time the pregnancy, then it’s left to her. This is obviously not a new case, there are many cases like this. So, allow her to decide on her own, cous anything you decide for her and cause her unhappiness will affect her and the baby inside her. Just comply with her. There is nothing new under the sun”.
This was all the HOD said and few days later, the parent gave their decision telling their ward to take the leave of absence and lose a year. They insisted that she can’t cope with the pregnancy and that after the baby is born, she won’t have to worry about the child, just her studies.
The girl child cried and cried and told me the story. I called so many people to talk to the father on her behalf but it seems like all hope is lost. She already made it clear that she will work harder cous she is currently on Second Class Lower. She already told them het mind about her school activities but they are not ready to give full hearings.
I want pregnant women and nursing mothers going to school to please speak on her behalf. Please, show faces and tell us experiences in school. Help the girl return back to school. Students and course mates, support the girl and help her return to school. She only has TODAY AND TOMORROW left. She need to return with us.
Help a sister.
Share your advice via IG
https://www.instagram.com/p/CyyZ37lMQ7K/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
Share Your advice on Twitter
https://twitter.com/insideoaumedia/status/1716852904466821248?s=46&t=-nFvq0QBZnmZfGFcR-t6qw
Well, this is simple…
The H.O.D has said it all. That is the best option.
She won’t be able to cope with the pregnancy and studies. Some people who are working alongside schooling find it difficult to do well Academically not to talk of pregnancy with studies.
How will she cope with the trauma? Pregnancy stress, mental and emotional stress for lectures, Ah, in OAU again.
It’s best she take a leave of absence at least it doesn’t mean that she’s out of school. She’s just taking a break.
It’s left for her to decide.
Everyone must be ready to take responsibility for his/her actions or inactions. Life is about taking responsibility. Since she is prepared to do that, I think she should be allowed, though definitely not a joyful one for her parents, but please let her continue. We’ve seen students go through school with pregnancy and come out well, just support with her with prayers and encouragement. When it happens this way, there’s little or nothing we can do as parents. She will have a story to tell.
I had a similar story
I was pregnant when I was in part 2 first semester I think, it was tough at the beginning, you know telling my family and all that. Thankfully they were supportive, then I thought I should apply for a leave of absence though there wasn’t any complications.
Then I met with my part adviser and he advised me that there’s no need to apply for leave of absence as long as I can cope with it and have people that can help and support, I yielded to his advise nd Thankfully I had my friends support always.
Honestly it was tough on some days with sickness and other stuffs that comes with pregnancy but at the end I scaled through.
Though almost close to the end of pregnancy we had a strike when we were about to write exams so that distorted some plan, so by the time we resumed back for exams I put to bed and that cost me to miss 3 exams and I had to rush back down almost immediately after delivery to finish my other exams.
Now I’m in my part 4 and my baby boy will be two years old next week, we are both still in school and I still have 1 more year to go
I have never for once regretted staying to continue my education
I felt like if I had taken the leave of absence I would probably not come back to complete my studies and I’m so grateful I made the right choice.
So, my advise to the girl is that if she really wants to continue her studies she should, I know you can do it.
But please and please make sure you have strong supports, I don’t mean parents support alone but genuine friends support, friends that gat you any time anyday (I’m so grateful for my friends)
Cos you can’t do without them, trust me it will be difficult some days and there are times you’ll laugh.
Trust me you will also regret your actions from time to time, but make sure you speak out always and don’t keep things in.
Surely people will talk but at the end you will be so grateful you never quitted.
Please and please if you feel you’re better off going for leave, please do
But if not, why not, just make sure you ask for help always when needed.
I pray the Lord help you to grow through this and makes it a smooth sailing for you and you baby.
Please don’t hesitate to reach out to me also, if you feel like. I’ll be more than happy to help.